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why do i get so nervous? @ 8:26 p.m. on 2002-06-26
This is a better entry. It is from an hour ago, and gives ya the full dirt on my weekend. Im such a piece of chicken shit. Why cant i just get up the nerves to ask him...He is a fucking human being just like me...Who is just as UNPERFECT as me...yet i let him make me so nervous and all girly? WHY WHY WHY. So this whole week has been leading up to this weekend, when i would get to talk to him. If you read previous entries you would know why. So we were talking..dededed...a laugh here...some good conversation there....and yet im all nervous. IM NERVOUS TALKING TO A FREAKING BOY! what is wrong with me. I kept making excuses in my mind as to why im not asking him what i had planned on for a week now.."Ok tawnya,,,if you are still talking to him by 8:30 you will ask him then...tawnya if he really liked you he could have totally said something to shown it with that last comment...tawnya why would he EVER want to do something with a loser like you......" ahhhh....and so he left. Now i will sit and think for an ENTIRE week of how the conversation will play out in my mind...How this weekend ill be BRAVE AND ACUALLy ask him... Im honestly and truly afraid of regretion. I honestly really like this guy, and all i can think of is evidence of how there is no way he can like me. ahhhhhhhhhh.......Now i will go and regret what i DIDNT DO...grrrrrrrrr...
 Tawnya
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