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crying @ 11:23 p.m. on 2001-07-03
why does this ALWAYS happen to me. why do i think so much. why cant things EVER work out for me. why is it that once im happy and confident about summin, i just ruin everything. why cant i have a perfect life. why do i always feel like an idoit. why do i always assume that i cause everything. why cant i be a different person. why do i do stupid things. why cant i just dissipear from life. why do i over analize things. why do i assume what people r thinky and get all mad. why cant i be more outgoing. why do i get some emotional attached to things. why do i ALWAYS screw up my chance with something good. why do people lie. why do i think if someone doesnt give me attention they hate me. why cant i read peoples mind. why do i get excited one min. to be let down the next. why cant i have the lives of other people. why am i soo damn picky. why why why why nething. i wish my life was a computer game and i could program the way i what. god. i know that i over react over things, and think things that arent true. but i love attention. thats why i fe;l for darryl so many times. he gave me attention (even though all he wanted was sex from me). when i dont get the attention it just wants me to want them even more. i give up. why do i like andrew so much and feel as if he doesnt like me nemore. i ruin everything. i dont care what ANYONE says. god. i feel like crying.
 Tawnya
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